For previous parts of this article click the 'On Impulsiveness' tag below.
The Impulsive Girl as a fellow-traveller is at first slight alluring, but is to be avoided by all who value their peace of mind. A friend of mine was once going on a Swiss tour with two girls, A and B. A was a bight, ardent, impulsive creature; B was quiet, undemonstrative, and usually considered rather cold.
"My only regret," said my friend, "is that B is going with us. I am afraid she will act as a wet blanket. I don't think the most glorious prospect would rouse her to enthusiasm. While as for A, it is positively refreshing to see her delight. If she and I were only going alone together, it would be perfect."
"Do not be too sure," I replied oracularly.
"Well, of course we must make the best of B's society," replied my friend; and we parted.
Two months later, we met again.
Oh where could this be heading, Mrs Watson?
Showing posts with label lily watson. Show all posts
Showing posts with label lily watson. Show all posts
Friday, 13 April 2012
Tuesday, 10 April 2012
24 March, 1888 - 'On Impulsiveness' by Lily Watson - 'The Impulsive Girl in her Domestic Relations'
For previous sections of this article, please click the tag 'On Impulsiveness' below. And for a series of articles on "district visiting" (that's what we call it when we go into the inner city to bestow charity upon The Poors) click here.
People who meet Miss Impulse only in congenial society are tempted to think she must make her home a very happy one. She is generally entertaining, for she says whatever first comes into her head; she is naive, bright and sparkling. They do not know that, even supposing her to be in the main a good girl, she is dreadfully trying to live with. Swayed by the feeling of the moment, she is either up in the clouds or down in the depths; chattering gaily on some absorbing topic, or dull and gloomy because she happens to feel dull and gloomy, and has never acquired the habit of considering anything beyond her momentary feeling. She is so very charming, when she is charming, that her friends feel it the more. When the Impulsive Girl comes down with a dismal face to breakfast, a chill falls upon the family circle.
People who meet Miss Impulse only in congenial society are tempted to think she must make her home a very happy one. She is generally entertaining, for she says whatever first comes into her head; she is naive, bright and sparkling. They do not know that, even supposing her to be in the main a good girl, she is dreadfully trying to live with. Swayed by the feeling of the moment, she is either up in the clouds or down in the depths; chattering gaily on some absorbing topic, or dull and gloomy because she happens to feel dull and gloomy, and has never acquired the habit of considering anything beyond her momentary feeling. She is so very charming, when she is charming, that her friends feel it the more. When the Impulsive Girl comes down with a dismal face to breakfast, a chill falls upon the family circle.
Friday, 6 April 2012
24 March, 1888 - 'On Impulsiveness' by Lily Watson - Introduction
This is the first "OH GIRLS THESE DAYS!!" article I believe I've posted here. Others are probably available at the old Tumblr and when the 'Read More' button failed to work were probably the bane of everybody's dashboards. Oh well, that's why I moved to Blogspot. Big blocks of text are more the done thing over here.
But yes. Mrs Watson on the unfortunate phenomenon of the impulsive girl. Impulsiveness is bad. No manic pixie dream girls or toxic frenemies here, thank you very much.
"Sensible and cold-hearted!" exclaims Molly Gibson's stepmother, the former Mrs Kirkpatrick, in Mrs Gaskell's delightful story of "Wives and Daughters". "Now, that's a kind of character which may be very valuable, but which revolts me. Give me warmth of heart, even with a little of that extravagance of feeling which misleads the judgment and conducts into romance. Poor Mr Kirkpatrick! That was just his character. I used to tell him that his love for me was quite romantic. I think I have told you about his walking five miles in the rain to get me a muffin once when I was ill?"
"Yes," said Molly. "It was very kind of him."
"So imprudent too! Just what one of your sensible, cold-hearted, commonplace people would never have thought of doing. With his cough and all."
"I hope he didn't suffer for it?" replied Molly.
"Yes, indeed he did. I odn't think he ever got over the cold he caught that day."
Men that share the amiable weakness of the late Mr Kirkpatrick, who would risk making his wife a widow to gratify her passing whim, are not very numerous! But Mrs Gibson does not stand alone in her impression that to act upon impulse rather than judgment, is a very charming and delightful thing. And girls especially, whose emotional nature is vehement, and whose reason, for one cause or another, is not fully disciplined, are apt to fall into the snare of regarding the feeling of the moment, and that alone, as a sufficient motive for action. They have a horror, and rightly, or cold calculationg motives, and therefore fly to the opposite extreme of not having any reasonable motives at all.
These impulsive girls have, generally speaking, many delightful qualities. They are frank, affectionate, and generous, and one is apt to contrast them with the cold, selfish and undemonstrative, very much to their own advantage. Then comes the deduction "It is better to be impulsive than to act on judgment." A moment's thought of course would show that this comparison is by no means fair. The impulsive girl with her good qualities should be placed side by side with one who is also frank, affectionate and generous, but who has a sufficient share of judgment to guide her behaviour. Then the infinite advantage would be seen to lie with the latter.
Just because this "impulsiveness" which is a real danger presents a charming aspect when vaugely and indefinitely considered, it is worth while to look at it closely and see if its various manifestations are really to be admired. Since illustration is much more interesting than abstract lecturing, we will picture the "impulsive girl" in two or three characters; and if some of my readers have not met her in real life I should be very much surprised.
After the cut: The Impulsive Girl as a Friend
But yes. Mrs Watson on the unfortunate phenomenon of the impulsive girl. Impulsiveness is bad. No manic pixie dream girls or toxic frenemies here, thank you very much.
"Sensible and cold-hearted!" exclaims Molly Gibson's stepmother, the former Mrs Kirkpatrick, in Mrs Gaskell's delightful story of "Wives and Daughters". "Now, that's a kind of character which may be very valuable, but which revolts me. Give me warmth of heart, even with a little of that extravagance of feeling which misleads the judgment and conducts into romance. Poor Mr Kirkpatrick! That was just his character. I used to tell him that his love for me was quite romantic. I think I have told you about his walking five miles in the rain to get me a muffin once when I was ill?"
"Yes," said Molly. "It was very kind of him."
"So imprudent too! Just what one of your sensible, cold-hearted, commonplace people would never have thought of doing. With his cough and all."
"I hope he didn't suffer for it?" replied Molly.
"Yes, indeed he did. I odn't think he ever got over the cold he caught that day."
Men that share the amiable weakness of the late Mr Kirkpatrick, who would risk making his wife a widow to gratify her passing whim, are not very numerous! But Mrs Gibson does not stand alone in her impression that to act upon impulse rather than judgment, is a very charming and delightful thing. And girls especially, whose emotional nature is vehement, and whose reason, for one cause or another, is not fully disciplined, are apt to fall into the snare of regarding the feeling of the moment, and that alone, as a sufficient motive for action. They have a horror, and rightly, or cold calculationg motives, and therefore fly to the opposite extreme of not having any reasonable motives at all.
These impulsive girls have, generally speaking, many delightful qualities. They are frank, affectionate, and generous, and one is apt to contrast them with the cold, selfish and undemonstrative, very much to their own advantage. Then comes the deduction "It is better to be impulsive than to act on judgment." A moment's thought of course would show that this comparison is by no means fair. The impulsive girl with her good qualities should be placed side by side with one who is also frank, affectionate and generous, but who has a sufficient share of judgment to guide her behaviour. Then the infinite advantage would be seen to lie with the latter.
Just because this "impulsiveness" which is a real danger presents a charming aspect when vaugely and indefinitely considered, it is worth while to look at it closely and see if its various manifestations are really to be admired. Since illustration is much more interesting than abstract lecturing, we will picture the "impulsive girl" in two or three characters; and if some of my readers have not met her in real life I should be very much surprised.
After the cut: The Impulsive Girl as a Friend
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